“And he called the place Massah and Meribah because the Israelites quarreled and because they tested the LORD saying, ‘Is the LORD among us or not?’” – Exodus 17.7

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this morning, brian threw out a question to the assembly; immediately, an answer formed in my mind and sunk like a rock, finding it’s way to the bottom of my heart. brian asked us,

“when you’re going through a transition, what kind of things would you use to describe what you’re feeling?”

and people probably felt things like: chaos, confusion, doubt, wonder, impatience, etc.

my word, though, was temptation. i feel tempted most when i am leaving the “duties of the inner court” and waiting to enter into the manifesting transformative arena of “the most holy place”. the twenty-inch span between the two sides of the veil (in the second temple)  feels like a mile wide chasm of temptation to me.

i feel tempted most when i am in transition. it’s my massah: it’s where i am right now: it’s where this winter has me camped. specifically, for me, i am in between employment and waiting to see what this means for me and my family.

this is why “the lord’s prayer” is proving more and more to be a required force in my life, much like the laws of gravity or motion.

before this prayer is anything, we need to understand what it’s not. it’s not, for example, an entirely new concept that yeshua made up on the spot: he intentionally took an existing prayer* and added to it – which is a pattern he continues to reveal throughout the gospels! this prayer is also not an outdated intended only for the disciples at that time: every rabbi in that day and age had a series of prayers, and really, a prayer, that defined their sort of purpose and gave life to their community – this is why the disciples are caught asking for a prayer in the same way that john (the baptizer) had given his disciples a prayer (or, had taught them to pray).

this particular prayer was an intentional and deeply meaningful prayer which was to carry the breath of men for ages to come: these words are the defining conversation starters between us, the children, and our father: oh, it’s more! it is the headpiece that yeshua fashioned for his bride to wear as she prepares to meet him in the last days!

[selah]

and ultimately, much commentary can be made regarding each line or word of this prayer; but i want to circle back to massah. it’s the part of the prayer that often is recited, but rarely understood and therefore rarely realized.

“lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from the evil (one).”

cutting right to the chase, the israelites of exodus 17 are wandering in transition. they have the manna (which really means, “what-is-it?”). they have the leadership of moses. they have grumbling and desert and wandering before them. and they are led to a place near rephidim: they are thirsty: and there is no water to drink. essentially, the question, no, the temptation, arises within them, “WHAT KIND OF MANIPULATIVE GOD LEADS US TO THE DESERT WITH NO WATER – A MURDEROUS AND ABSENT GOD HE MUST BE. IS HE AMONG US, IS HE FOR US, OR NOT?” (my speculation). but indeed. YHWH tells moses to strike a rock and water will spring forth – from the rock – and water is provided unto the children of the desert.

it is here that the place they were led is given two names: massah & meribah = temptation and reviling.

fast-forward. yeshua now teaches his disciples to pray, “lead us not into massah temptation: but deliver us from evil.” the language stretches back to the pentateuch: to the exodus.

what are we basically saying when we pray those words? we are agreeing that we do not want to relive the desert experience of distrusting GOD. we are asking GOD to keep us trusting him. we don’t want to be led into the temptation that GOD does not have a plan for us in the midst of what looks like a place with no plan!

we are asking to be delivered from unbelief and utterly given over to belief. yes. in the place of transition. in the chaos. in the confusion.

may we not relive that portion of the desert experience. may we fear not, only believe.

*this existing prayer is the kaddish, central to jewish liturgy along with the s’hma and amidah.

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despite my unbelief, i believe that who i am is a son of the only living god & king, YHWH [blessed be his name]. a son of the resurrection. a son of the wind which bends all things.

“Somewhere along the way the movement of Jesus Christ became civilized as Christianity…” – Erwin McManus, The Barbarian Way

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add this to the running list of church taboos: freedom.

how dare we teach people that they are free! or so says many a church-folk today.

freedom, what an ironic word! it carries the weight of a thousand implications; the burden of change riding boldly on its back.

but somewhere along the way…yes, somewhere along her journey, the church, like the children of israel, shrunk back in fear rather than humbly moving forward in faith; fear has a way of paralyzing even the most confident of souls, while faith graciously propels us forward. so this shrinking back, this outward act of fear, produced another kind of fear: the fear to be truly free.

we are frequently offended that the christ actually did what he said he would do: set us free.

[selah]

for the blind man, his freedom to sight meant that he was now responsible for what he looked at. or didn’t look at.

for the lame man, his freedom to mobility meant that he was now responsible for where he went. or did not choose to go.

for the leper, her freedom to intimacy meant that she was now responsible for who she let get close. or did not.

[selah]

for me. for you. for us. our freedoms open so many doors: and that, to be honest, is kind of scary. sometimes, real scary. but this is not the totality of it all. because, if freedom only produces fear, it is a freedom not rooted in faith; the freedom that the christ gives, is an all encompassing freedom: it is for freedom that he has set us free: why would he free us from one thing only to be enslaved by another when his desire is that we be free from all things because we are placed in him – the one who brings freedom?

for me. for you. for us. our freedoms open so many doors: and that, to be honest, is kind of scary. because we fear that we will return to adamic ways: failure. we are afraid that we’ll mess everything up! (and sometimes we mess a lot up – only GOD is everything, and we are no where near powerful enough to mess him up.)

but again. when we see those chains of the world (guilt, shame, fear, etcetera) for where and what they truly are (broken and laying at our feet) and we see our god for who he truly is (loving, compassionate, and abounding in grace) we can move forward in freedom and faith. we can move into deeper intimacy with YHWH.

freedom in and through the christ is not something to be feared when we remember we’re all sons and daughters of the king of kings of kings. we’ve been forgiven millions. we are being loved and rescued and made righteous always and forever.

we’re not only on a journey – our GOD is the journey. he is the truth. he is the life. and it is for freedom that he has set us free.

your thoughts?

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despite my unbelief, i believe that who i am is a son of the only living god & king, YHWH [blessed be his name]. a son of the resurrection. a son of the wind which bends all things.

“fear not. only believe.” – yeshua of nazareth

the sky was very dark and water was falling from the heavens. and every so often, the wind would stir and streaks of light would reflect off of owen’s eyes.

i think it was one of the coolest ‘conversations’ i have had with my son yet. we whispered together while at the same time watching together. it was an incredible feeling to watch a storm through the eyes of a one-year old: every drop of rain turned his head, every flash of lightning seemed to cause him to wonder.

but we also whispered. it began with him raising his hand, pointing toward infinity, and whispering what i am pretty sure was, “whoa.” i replied, as quietly and carefully as i could, “yes, son, that just happened.” i proceeded to put it forth that there is, indeed, a god with a name [blessed be his holy name] who is the source of all things: who creates the wind: who turns dawn into darkness: who is the only true god: yes, YHWH, the lord of hosts, is his name.

but every so often, thunder would crack through the silence. and naturally, his little ears would hear such a sound and cause his eyes to blink in fear. it occurred to me that there was no better time to reveal these words of jesus to a scared soul, “fear not. only believe.”

it is nothing new to hear that fear paralyzes and faith propels; that fear and faith are so delicately opposed while also being definitvely intertwined. i wanted owen to understand that the command to fear not is given to us not because jesus is a cold-hearted, numb and naive man with no compassion for those who find themselves afraid; he gives this command alongside another command: only believe, only have faith.

there will be times when we are scared, but our response is not to fear. we are, in fact, commanded to only believe. to believe that YHWH is who he says he is. to believe that our god cares about us. to believe that all things are ours. to believe that he will finish/complete/make whole what he begins. to believe that even death is not the end for those in christ jesus. to believe that our god is the lord of hosts and his command is to take the land! only believe.

our god turns dawn into darkness, for it is often under the cover of darkness that our eyes fail and faith prevails.

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despite my unbelief, i believe that who i am is a son of the only living god & king, YHWH [blessed be his name]. a son of the resurrection. a son of the wind which bends all things.