a beautiful mess » damage

REMEDY FOLLOWS GRAVITY DOWN

justin — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 14:32:58 +0000

(disclaimer: this is a slam poem, so the meter is most present when read aloud, and more specifically, with a meter that i have in my head…if that makes any sense. i have really been moved by john’s account of how yeshua responds to the woman caught in adultery (john 8) and the reality, the brutality, the honest grit of it all – how it should play out like a movie scene, but how we have a tendency to make it so lifeless and absurdly sterile…so nonetheless…)

REMEDY FOLLOWS GRAVITY DOWN

remedy

follows

gravity

down

this is why GOD is found making tabernacle in dirt for his renown;

why he’s found kneeling at the head of her who was found out:

that whore who can’t utter a sound lest her shame cover her mouth

(which no doubt profanes the name of him she sees now

kneeling, leaning down

and he grabs her hand and

wraps his fingers around hers

and she feels his pulse and

in an instant is lost

in his eyes of grace) but then she pulls back from his embrace

and begins

to drown

in the sea of those around her

of those who found her and bound her

and dragged her through the town

leaving her stranded, naked, exposed and

falling

down

to the earth below

with tears in her eyes and nothing to show

for the years of trusting lies and guys and

becoming a disguise of a woman with a past once before

who didn’t always dream of finding her clothes on the floor

and her lips on men she knew no more than those idols

and recitals she looked to with high hopes as she danced for all

the people to see.

and do they come in love?

no.

but with stones behind spineless backs

and permanent words from hearts that lack

love,

they keep on coming back to attack

and keep her on her bare back

(just because they like the view)

do you come in love? do you?

II.

and so he gathers a halug from the wind

covers her shoulders, her chest and looks into her eyes for the first time again.

helping her on unsteady feet,

an unready heart beating and beaten

she’s lost all meaning with nothing to keep

her attention on the words falling from his lips,

he whispers, “woman. rise up! and look not on with eyes of defeat,

for i have been watching and waiting

for your cry, your plea.

behold, where you now stand is the

new

mercy

seat,

this is it, this is it, this is the year of

jubilee!

III.

in this next divine second

earth was met by heaven

as he knelt over the ground

and once again the finger of GOD began

to trace the sound of the law as it is found

in the freedom of heaven which is not bound

as a religious noun

or even a place that can be traveled around or

a thing that one might could pin

down

IV.

NO! it was right then and there:

writing on the hard earth

as it is right here and now:

being written on hearts of worth

always giving birth to the righting of wrongs

and the writing of songs

about the story of the one who came riding along

on the back of an ass which didn’t belong

in the empire of hate or the temple of late

in whose shadow and gate he now

patiently waits for the trap of

those who proclaim

to know the GOD who comes in love-

do we come in love?

do we?

at last an old voice breaks free

declaring for all to see,

“hear, o people, of this woman’s infidelity!

she was caught in the very act of adultery!”

and to him, the one with her, they now take aim.

“in the law, moses commands to stone such sl- women.

now, what do you say?”

VI.

the time that passed you can’t comprehend.

you can’t fathom the beginning of the end.

“let any one of you who is without sin

be the first to throw a stone

her.”

and the world

began to blur

and the words

began to hurt, and cut a deep wound;

the kind that bleeds life into an empty tomb

as it makes room

for the lungs to expand

and the hand to demand

the release of the stone and

the repentance of every man.

VII.

gravitation: the means by which

objects with mass and weight are attracted to one an other.

like enemies becoming our sister, our brother.

like her, like us, loving each other.

i wonder, i shutter to think

if we would love with a furious love

and put down our sword, put down our shield

would we become a gravitational field

with a body so great and a weight so real

that all would be drawn to drink the wine

and in his good time, eat the meal?

so we all may be poured out

that others be filled!

may we all be broken

that others be healed!

may we join her and leave behind

our daily ways of deathly wages

to follow after the king of kings of kings,

the remedy of the ages.

and may we follow him down

to those on the ground

outside the walls and outside the towns

to get in their skin, to kneel where they kneel

this is compassion, to feel what they feel.

and turn eastward, ii

justin — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 16:22:43 +0000

“You will drink from the brook, and I have directed the ravens to supply you with food there. So he did what the LORD had told him. He went to the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan, and stayed there. The ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning and bread and meat in the evening, and he drank from the brook.” – III Kings 17.4-6

“…but really I’ve been learning how to die” – Jon foreman, Learning How To Die

to read the previous journal entry, please follow this link.

i don’t know what’s truly more shocking: that the god elijah was trusting in to bring him to the people of that same god so that he may be a catalyst, instead told him to go hide in a ravine where “ravens will bring you meat” and “you will drink from the brook” – or that elijah actually did what was told him!

so this disturbed me. so much so that i have been letting it roll around in my mouth, switching sides like one might do with a throat lozenge; meditating and picturing elijah’s newfound life unfold.

observe. you will drink from the brook. one vibrant image came out of this, at least for me. elijah’s posture would be that of stooping, of getting low, of humbling himself to drink from the brook. now, there is nothing in the text telling us that elijah was being disciplined in any way – remember, this is elijah’s apparent introduction to the vocational career of prophet! it was just how it was.

it’s his beginning: and GOD is leading him by ways known to the humble. and so the question rises, as i begin my day, will it look like elijah’s posture of humility and surrender: bending a knee to the ground, lowering my face to the source of refreshment and life, my hands forming a bowl with palms upward turned: that i might receive from such a brook and the very promise of my god?

[selah]

then comes this peculiar little phrase: and i have directed the ravens to supply you with food. two things are really at work here.

1) ravens were in the uncoveted list of unclean animals. which is to say that, anything they touch would also be unclean. including the supply they would bring to this young prophet of GOD by the very direction of the same god.

and b) often times throughout the scriptures and ancient literature, you’ll find reference to animals in light of their very real, analogous human counterparts. which i believe to be the accurate case here. GOD would be directing “ravens”, unclean gentiles living near the kerith ravine to bring elijah food – which makes for an even more dramatic unfolding whereby we are reminded of the strange places to find the reign of GOD at work!

all leading to a second question: do i trust GOD at his word and enjoy the supply he provides? right. because for all intensive purposes, elijah could have argued with YHWH about the provision being unclean – after all, he said it would come from ravens – and he was a prophet, surely he could not be caught eating food that was unclean! right?

but this reminds me of a situation in which yeshua was asked about the supply, the very meat, of gentiles. he declares,

“are you so dull?” he asked. “don’t you see that nothing that enters a man from the outside can make him ‘unclean’? for it doesn’t go into his heart but into his stomach, and then out of his body.”

interesting then that yeshua was even thought to be elijah near the end of his public ministry…(luke 9.19). interesting then that yeshua is found eating with zaccheus, tax collectors, sinners, prostitutes and all of his colorful and broken friends; friends that were unclean: ravens, if you will.

yes. i believe GOD led elijah to a place that was cut through a valley by water and time, that he might be cut through the heart by Wind and time. elijah may have thought his agenda was clear, he may have thought it was about himself, he may have thought it was about speaking the right words or having the right vision or learning how to laugh at the situation he was brought to or learning how to cry real tears: but really, he would be learning how to die: how to die to pride: how to die to judgmentalism: how to die to his own agenda: how to die to himself.

and do you know how long he would be enrolled at this school of sorrow in the kerith ravine, drinking from a brook and depending upon GOD to bring the ravens? three-and-a-half-years-he-was-in-the-ravine! now, whether that was exactly 547.5 days or somewhere close to it, the point (from an authentic hebraic understanding) is that elijah was only HALF way through this process.

[selah]

we each have our own kerith ravine’s just like we each have our own calcutta’s and our own crosses. may we live and live well. and when we should falter, or completely wipeout; when we are damaged, or when we are the cause of such damage: may we live to remember that GOD can overcome a heart that is overcome (dc*b). he provides for all he has made.

–

despite my unbelief, i believe that who i am is a son of the only living god & king, YHWH [blessed be his name]. a son of the resurrection. a son of the wind which bends all things.