a beautiful mess

“And he called the place Massah and Meribah because the Israelites quarreled and because they tested the LORD saying, ‘Is the LORD among us or not?’” – Exodus 17.7

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this morning, brian threw out a question to the assembly; immediately, an answer formed in my mind and sunk like a rock, finding it’s way to the bottom of my heart. brian asked us,

“when you’re going through a transition, what kind of things would you use to describe what you’re feeling?”

and people probably felt things like: chaos, confusion, doubt, wonder, impatience, etc.

my word, though, was temptation. i feel tempted most when i am leaving the “duties of the inner court” and waiting to enter into the manifesting transformative arena of “the most holy place”. the twenty-inch span between the two sides of the veil (in the second temple)  feels like a mile wide chasm of temptation to me.

i feel tempted most when i am in transition. it’s my massah: it’s where i am right now: it’s where this winter has me camped. specifically, for me, i am in between employment and waiting to see what this means for me and my family.

this is why “the lord’s prayer” is proving more and more to be a required force in my life, much like the laws of gravity or motion.

before this prayer is anything, we need to understand what it’s not. it’s not, for example, an entirely new concept that yeshua made up on the spot: he intentionally took an existing prayer* and added to it – which is a pattern he continues to reveal throughout the gospels! this prayer is also not an outdated intended only for the disciples at that time: every rabbi in that day and age had a series of prayers, and really, a prayer, that defined their sort of purpose and gave life to their community – this is why the disciples are caught asking for a prayer in the same way that john (the baptizer) had given his disciples a prayer (or, had taught them to pray).

this particular prayer was an intentional and deeply meaningful prayer which was to carry the breath of men for ages to come: these words are the defining conversation starters between us, the children, and our father: oh, it’s more! it is the headpiece that yeshua fashioned for his bride to wear as she prepares to meet him in the last days!

[selah]

and ultimately, much commentary can be made regarding each line or word of this prayer; but i want to circle back to massah. it’s the part of the prayer that often is recited, but rarely understood and therefore rarely realized.

“lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from the evil (one).”

cutting right to the chase, the israelites of exodus 17 are wandering in transition. they have the manna (which really means, “what-is-it?”). they have the leadership of moses. they have grumbling and desert and wandering before them. and they are led to a place near rephidim: they are thirsty: and there is no water to drink. essentially, the question, no, the temptation, arises within them, “WHAT KIND OF MANIPULATIVE GOD LEADS US TO THE DESERT WITH NO WATER – A MURDEROUS AND ABSENT GOD HE MUST BE. IS HE AMONG US, IS HE FOR US, OR NOT?” (my speculation). but indeed. YHWH tells moses to strike a rock and water will spring forth – from the rock – and water is provided unto the children of the desert.

it is here that the place they were led is given two names: massah & meribah = temptation and reviling.

fast-forward. yeshua now teaches his disciples to pray, “lead us not into massah temptation: but deliver us from evil.” the language stretches back to the pentateuch: to the exodus.

what are we basically saying when we pray those words? we are agreeing that we do not want to relive the desert experience of distrusting GOD. we are asking GOD to keep us trusting him. we don’t want to be led into the temptation that GOD does not have a plan for us in the midst of what looks like a place with no plan!

we are asking to be delivered from unbelief and utterly given over to belief. yes. in the place of transition. in the chaos. in the confusion.

may we not relive that portion of the desert experience. may we fear not, only believe.

*this existing prayer is the kaddish, central to jewish liturgy along with the s’hma and amidah.

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despite my unbelief, i believe that who i am is a son of the only living god & king, YHWH [blessed be his name]. a son of the resurrection. a son of the wind which bends all things.

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